Maybe not always but definitely forever
by MonumentalMelody
Summary: The war with Valentine never saw Sebastian appear. Jace and Clary found out weeks later they weren't related. The Angel never rose, Jace never died, and Clary never faced her true feelings for Jace. The two now train together, and neither will open up about how they feel. With new threats looming will they ever be able to admit their feelings or will they cause more harm than good?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

 **I started playing with a short story of Clary but in the Shadowhunter reality. Please let me know what you think of it. I posted a chapter or two of this already in another fic, but I decided to make this its own fic. This takes place just after the war with Valentine and Sebastian but he never appears, Jace and Clary only find out afterwards that they aren't related.**

The moment Clary woke she realised she slept in. She was late. Still plagued by sleep, Clary started getting ready for training as fast as her muscles would let her. She was still sore from her last training session. It was three days ago, but none of the Lightwoods had gone easy on her. After everything with her father and real brother, they wanted to make she sure she was fully prepared for the next threat. She slipped on her black training pants and a black crop. She decided that the loose tee shirts she wore didn't allow her the same movement and would get caught on her blades. She had training with Jace today. That's the last thing she wanted. Out of them all, he trained her the hardest. They still weren't really talking. Since finding out, they were siblings and then finding out that that was a lie everything had become too hard for him to deal with and in classic Jace form he ignored everything and focused on the mission and only the mission putting his feelings and Clary aside.

Clary's mother had argued with her daughter about living at the institute. At the moment Clary could only stay there three nights. It was frustrating moving back and forth between the two rooms, but it was helpful on the days she was there. Unfortunately for Clary today was not one of those days. She raced out the door not bothering with breakfast. She knew she would get an earful when she arrived for being so late already. The one good thing for Clary being up so early meant that there were few people around. Clary raced down the street towards the train station. She did love Luke, but he lived so far away from the institute. As Clary reached the station something or someone must have been on her side as the train just arrived as she got to her platform.

Clary could see the old dilapidated church transform before her. It still took a little longer for her to see through glamours. It was slowly getting better, but sometimes she could tell when the others saw something she couldn't and Clary would have to concentrate much harder to see anything. Some days Clary would go home with a raging headache from pushing too far. She much preferred the headaches to the bruises and sore muscles she got after training. Clary was completely out of breath by the time she reached the front doors. Her legs burned from running and bounding up the stairs. She was definitely not in shape in be a Shadowhunter. She had only been training for just over two weeks. She hoped all this training would become easier.

At first, her mother refused to let Clary train. She still wanted to keep her from this world. After days of arguing and Clary starting to sneak around her mother finally relented. Izzy had begun to train her in small parts of combat and strategy. Alec got on board as well and believed she needed to know how to protect herself. Jace was much like Clary's mother and took a while to convince. He refused to spend time with Clary and if she was ever started to train he would stop and leave the training room. It took Jace a while to come to terms with this new Clary. She had always been stubborn, but this was different. She was passionate and hungry to learn. That died down after Jace started to train with her. She would often try to convince Izzy to train with her instead, but they all knew that Jace was the best fighter out of the three of them and it was agreed to throw Clary into the deep end.

Jace threw himself into teaching Clary. If he was to train her, he wanted her to be the best. Jace wasn't going to half-ass anything. He knew he pushed Clary during their training sessions, but if she ever came up against a demon, it would not go easy on her. Jace cared deeply about Clary, whether she was her brother or not. He couldn't quite deal with those feelings yet but either way, he knew he wanted to protect her and give her the ability to keep herself safe.

Clary waited impatiently as the elevator seemed to move, more slowly than it ever had, to the training room floor. When Clary heard the Ding of the doors opening, she braced herself. She was over an hour late. Clary definitely would pay for this. She quickly made her way towards the double doors that opened onto the training room. As she rounded the corner, she saw him. Standing tall, Jace's blond hair hung in soft curls, his arms were crossed, and he was looking away from her. She knew once he looked at her she would see everything he felt in his eyes. Clary used to love looking into his eyes and being able to read him so easily; now it just made her feel uncomfortable. She felt now that she was invading his personal space, she was somehow violating something unspoken between them. Clary did not know whether he knew how quickly she could read him. It made finding out they weren't related so much worse. She saw how happy he was, to begin with, and then saw that joy move to sadness and turn into confusion and finally into regret.

"I guess you don't want to take any of this training seriously," Jace spoke without looking at Clary. "If you don't want to learn or train don't bother turning up next time, it's better than being late." Jace had turned away from her and walked through the doors. Clary stood stunned for a moment. She had prepared for yelling, for anger for anything but calm and almost detached disappointment. Clary was uncertain what to do. After a moment she pulled herself together and followed Jace into the room.

If Clary thought even for a moment that Jace's words were all she was going to get for being late, she would have never been more wrong. Jace pushed harder than usual. They started with hand to hand combat. Clary's back hit the mat more times than she even got one hit on Jace.

"Again." Jace outstretched his hand for the fifth time to help Clary to her feet. At first, Clary ignored his hand and would lift herself up, but by now Clary was getting tired and reluctantly took his hand. As Jace closed his fingers around Clary's small delicate hand, they both felt a jolt between them. At that moment they both looked at each other. Clary could see in Jace's eyes that he felt the same thing she had.

For weeks neither one of them had touched. Other than training there was no physical contact between them, even during train all contact was during hand to hand. Jace wouldn't even touch Clary to help her adjust her grip on a blade or knife. This was different. Jace looked away quickly and pulled Clary up, letting go the second he knew she was steady on her feet. Jace wanted to move on. He could tell Clary had felt what he had. He tried to ignore it, but he knew if he dwelled on it for even a moment Clary would want to talk about it. Clary had wanted to talk the second they found out they weren't siblings. Jace pushed it away. He now regretted doing that. Jace thought about how it could have helped to talk it through but he like Clary was often too stubborn for his own good.

Clary could tell Jace did not want to talk and instead landed a good kick to his side as he turned away from her. If he didn't want to talk, then she wouldn't either. Knowing he was off guard was her secret asset. If he had been facing her, he would have seen it coming. Jace took a step to the side and curled slightly towards his now sore side. He knew that this was her way of saying she was going to move on and not dwell. It brought a small smile to Jace's face knowing that she knew him so well. As he turned to face Clary, she landed a punch to his cheek. Jace looked at Clary stunned. _Where was this energy coming from?_ Jace could have sworn that she wouldn't have lasted much longer after she hit the mat the fourth time.

Clary felt proud of herself. She hadn't ever landed two hits in a row. Not even on Isabelle who always went easy on her. Clary had this new found energy which allowed her to land several more hits. Both Jace and Clary were out of breath soon after. Jace was getting tired and possibly lazy as Clary was able to land more punches than she ever had before. Clary thought for a moment that Jace was going easy on her. She swept her leg up and prepared to use all the force she had left to land one last kick to his stomach. Unfortunately for her Jace was not planning on going easy nor planning on letting her beat him. He grabbed her leg before she struck him and pulled making Clary fall once again onto her back.

Clary landed with a thud. She had forgotten to use her arms to soften her fall, and her shoulders bared the brunt of her fall. Clary did not want to get up again. She laid stunned for a second on the mat. She felt defeated. She was so confident that she would finally beat Jace. To her surprise, Jace didn't offer her his hand nor tell her to get up to go again. He fell beside her obviously exhausted.

"I think that's enough for today," he said between pants. Their last sparring session went for almost three times as long, and neither one of them could even think about standing let alone sparring again. It took about 10 minutes before Clary had finally caught her breath and felt strong enough to stand. Neither one of them had said anything in that time. They lay their silently. Clary listened as Jace's breathing sounded less and less harsh and returned to normal. She realised that he stayed lying down next to her even though he had caught his breath and could have started another round. Clary enjoyed the feeling of having him so close to her.

Jace knew he should get up and keep training but a small part of him liked lying down next to Clary.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

 **Hey guys. I thought I'd clarify somethings about this fic, so this is set just after the first war against Valentine. Clary and Jace don't find out they aren't related till after the war. Valentine never raised the angel instead he was captured and was questioned using the soul sword, and that's how they found out. Johnathan was the same as the books and presumed dead. Anyway, I won't say too much more. Please let me know what you think! If you have any other questions, please feel free to message me.**

The two of them lay there for a moment longer. Jace was lost in his thoughts of Clary and Clary could not stop thinking about what to say. She knew the second she would open her mouth the moment would be ruined, and Jace would get stubborn and defensive and throw her straight back into training. This silence was killing Clary. Normally the two of them were never alone or doing anything for there to be no silence, and definitely not for this long. Clary could feel the air thick with tension. She wondered if Jace felt it too.

Jace was too lost in his thoughts about how things could have been different if he had sucked it up and talked to Clary about everything. When it all came out at first, Jace did need a moment to digest everything. His feelings for Clary never changed even when he thought they were related. He thought maybe he had confused his feelings and this love he felt for her was brotherly love. He told himself over and over that it was just platonic brotherly love. That he'd never had blood family before and that he was just confused. During those months, he lay awake trying not to think of Clary. He tried thinking of anyone else. Alec and Magnus had taken him on a few nights out to help cheer him up, but whenever a girl flirted with him, he felt nothing. He felt bored and would end up leaving early claiming to be tired. One night when he was dragged out by Alec, he saw Clary with Izzy. She had dressed Clary up in the same short tight black dress she had worn to Magnus's party. Her hair was down in soft curls, and she was sitting up at the bar. Both girls were laughing at something one of the many boys around them had said. There were at least four of them crowded around them. Izzy and Clary were in the middle and had two boys on either side. Jace watched from across the room as Izzy grabbed Clary's wrist and led her to the dance floor. The two girls twirled and danced together. Jace could see the other boys watching them. One of them Jace could see was encouraging one of his friends to go up and join them. Jace hoped and prayed to the angel that he was keen on Izzy, but as he continued to watch the boy went up behind Clary and started dancing with her. Rage filled Jace's body. He wanted to go over there and knock the guy's teeth out. He knew it was more than just brotherly protection. He wanted to look away but he couldn't. He watched as the guy leaned down and kissed Clary. Her body was pressed up against his and Jace used every ounce of willpower he had not to go over there. He abruptly stood up and left. That was when Jace decided that what he was feeling couldn't be ignored or pushed aside thinking it was brotherly love. He decided right then and there that until he could get Clary out of his head, he would do anything or anyone until he didn't think of her.

Jace had hooked up with a different girl every night for the next three weeks. He was slowly starting to get over Clary and started seeing her as a sister. He was getting better. He would see her dressed up with Izzy in the club and feel ok. He would see guys dancing with her, and there was a somewhat normal amount of brotherly protectiveness. He finally started to think that he could be Clary's brother, he knew that he needed to be the best brother he could be. He hadn't been there for her all these years, and over the past few weeks he hadn't been great, but he wanted to change. He wanted to be like Alec and Izzy, and he finally felt like he could be. The next few weeks past with Clary and Jace slowly starting to get on. They definitely fought like brother and sister, especially when Clary came to him about training and living in the institute. While he still didn't look to Jocelyn as a mother, he knew she'd be on his side. Clary had yelled at Jace for going behind her back. Luckily for Clary, Izzy and Alec where on board and it wasn't long before she got her way. It was rare for Clary not to get her way. It was a few weeks later that they battled Valentine and found out that they weren't related. Jace and Clary sat motionless in the Accords Hall. Jace lost a sister in that moment and lost an entire family. He was a Herondale, but he was the last one. His last living relative was his grandmother who had sacrificed herself to save him on the boat. He realised then that she figured it out. She sacrificed herself to save her grandson, not the boy who was Valentines, son and spy. He stood up and left without looking at or saying anything to anyone.

He pushed Clary away for days after that. Ignoring her fire messages, leaving rooms whenever she walked in, suddenly disappearing from the training room when she was around. He couldn't handle all of this information. Every time he saw Clary he knew she wasn't his sister and a huge part of him was overjoyed. He realised that he had forced himself not to feel for her, but it had always been there deep down. He wanted to run to her and kiss her. He wanted to hold her, press her body against his. He wanted to be hers and for her to be his. But there was a very small part of him that feared she did not want this, that she had started dating Simon and was going to keep dating him. He thought about how that would rip him apart. He was also sad when he saw her. Knowing he wasn't part of her family anymore. In his lifetime, he had now lost three families; the Wayland's, the Morgenstern's, and now the Herondale's. While he never was really part of the first two he still felt like he lost a family each time he found out the truth. He was just warming to the idea of Jocelyn maybe one day being something like a mother to him.

Jace thought back to the day he was going to talk to Clary finally. Almost two months had passed since they had found out the truth. He walked down the hall towards her room. He was about to knock on the door when he heard her voice "But I think I love him." Clary was close to tears, he could hear it in her voice. "I know, and you're right." Clary was clearly on the phone because Jace couldn't hear the other voice. "I need to tell Simon." There were long pauses between each of Clary's comments. "He'll understand right, I mean it's not like it's coming from nowhere, he's like my brother, I can't see him any other way. I'm sure he'll understand. Do you think we will still be friends? I can't lose him as a friend, not after everything we've been through together." Jace couldn't believe what he was hearing. His worst fears had come true. Clary was in love with Simon, and she only saw Jace as a brother and friend. Jace went straight to his room and almost slammed the door shut. A few hours later there was a knock at the door. Clary walked in. Jace did not want to have this conversation. Not now not ever. "Hey, I wanted to talk. Things have changed, and I know everything's all over the place but I wanted to let you know…" Before Clary could finish Jace had cut her off.

"Don't worry about it. I don't really feel like talking right now. Things are still a bit weird with you not being my sister but maybe we can be friends, I guess. I mean now that we aren't related we don't have to put up with one another anymore." Jace knew his words might sting a little but if she was in love with Simon Jace needed time and space before he could be Clary's friend again. Clary had nodded and agreed before walking out of the room. In the days that followed Jace didn't see Simon once and just thought he was staying away. Jace wished he had said something the moment he found out they weren't related. He might have changed her mind about Simon. She might have fallen in love with him instead.

Clary was about to open her mouth and say something when her stomach grumbled rather loudly. Clary's cheeks flushed. She still hadn't eaten breakfast, and after the few rounds this morning her body had no energy left. She needed to eat. Jace was pulled from his daydreaming and quickly stood up. "Have you eaten today?" He asked as Clary stood slowly.

"No I was late, so I didn't have time for breakfast." Clary knew she was going to get scolded for not eating. Jace's favourite quote must be _Breakfast is the most important meal of the day._ He says it at almost every opportunity he gets. "Yes, I know breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but I didn't have time." Clary walked towards to doors of the training room. She turned and looked over her shoulder to where Jace was setting up another training activity. "I'll just grab something from the kitchen; I'll be back in ten."

While Clary was downstairs getting food, Jace started to set up and obstacle course. He couldn't get thoughts of Clary out of his head. It had been a few weeks since she had come into his room and since then they hadn't spent any time alone unless they were training. Jace couldn't stop looking at his hand. He had definitely felt a spark. Not like a static shock that can happen when training. This was different. He felt it travel up his arm and looking into her eyes he knew Clary felt it too. He was pulled from his thoughts when he heard the doors open and footsteps coming up behind him. He could tell the person was trying to be stealthy and quiet, but with Jace's years of training, he had perfect hearing. He could tell it was Clary from the way she moved and walked. He pretended not to hear her. He wanted to know what she could do. He felt a sharp kick to the back of his knees; he expected that Clary wasn't big enough, or strong enough to take him down by the shoulders yet. As his knees gave out, he turned and rammed his shoulder into Clary's stomach taking her down with him. She was pinned beneath him, Clary struggled for a moment, but Jace took possession of both of Clary's arms and pinned them above her head. He knelt up so that his knees were on either side of her hips. He had leant forward so that his face was over hers. He couldn't help it; his body reacted before his mind could.

"If you're going to sneak up on someone make sure you aren't making noise. I could hear you the moment you opened those doors. I knew the exact move you were going to make. You do this in the field, and you're dead." He said the last part with no emotion. He was too close to Clary; he needed to make sure he didn't overstep any boundaries. He let Clary go and got to his feet.

The rest of training passed quickly for Jace and slowly for Clary. By lunchtime, she knew she had a few more bruises to add to her ever-growing collection. She hated how pale she was in moments like these; her bruises showed up like flashing neon signs, they were impossible to miss. They both grabbed a quick lunch before returning to training. Clary didn't know how much longer she could last until Izzy entered the training room. At that exact moment, Clary landed flat on her back for the hundredth time that day. "Oh, ouch Clary, I thought that by now you'd get the hang of falling but clearly not." She smirked as she walked over and helped Clary up. "Ok, no more training for the day. I'm cutting you off from knocking Clary on her back." She glared cheekily at Jace. She turned back to Clary and smiled sweetly "It's been exactly one full year since we've met you and I have decided that we are all going out to celebrate." She turned again to look at Jace her expression hardening "And before you grunt or complain Jace you are joining us not buts, I don't want to hear it. We are leaving at 7 to have dinner at Taki's before going out be ready, or I will drag you out of the house kicking and screaming." She was not joking, both Clary and Jace knew that.

"Fine, I'll be ready by then." He turned and walked out of the room without another word. Izzy looked at Clary, and her cheeky grin crept back.

"Let's get you ready; we can't go out with you looking like this now can we." Clary knew there was no point fighting this, Izzy got her way no matter what so it was easier to go along with it. "Go shower and meet me in my room. You have 20 minutes, or I'm coming in to get you. Clary smiled at Izzy; she knew this was her way of showing love. She walked quickly to her room and showered, trying to wash all the dirt and sweat out of her hair from the day of training.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

 **Hey guys, thanks so much to everyone who has been reviewing it means so much to me. I know that these chapters are all one after the other but I promise soon these chapters will be a little more spread out. This document kept getting code written throughout it so there might be a few mistakes through this but I have combed through it as best as i could.**

Clary made it back to Izzy's room in less than 20 minutes. Clary bought a few pieces of clothing with her. Izzy had taken her shopping a few times, and she had begrudgingly bought a few dresses and one pair of heels. As Clary walked in, she saw several bags on the bed with tissue paper sticking out. Izzy had clearly spent the day shopping. Don't worry about those I have something brand new for you to wear tonight. It's a special occasion, and a new dress is a must." Clary lay her clothes on a chair in the corner of Izzy's room. "Ok, I might have bought more than one but this way you have a choice." Izzy started laying the dresses out on her bed. There were three that Clary could choose from. Clary knew Izzy was doing this for her and so she smiled sweetly. "Thank Iz, they all look beautiful." She went behind the floral screen Izzy had and changed into the first dress. It was lacy and silky and looked like a slip, not an actual dress. Rather than possibly starting an argument Clary came out to show Izzy. "I feel a little too naked in this one, but it feels really soft." Izzy made Clary turn. "Yea this one is too plain for tonight, ok next." the second one was also a dud. It was strapless and while it had been a year since Clary's first party and Izzy dressing her up for the first-time Clary hadn't grown that much to feel comfortable in a strapless yet really. The third one was Clary's favourite; it was also the one that covered the most skin. It was a black long-sleeved dress. It had sequins sown in different patterns. The sleeves were made of sheer material. The dress barely covered Clary's ass, since working out she now could say she had an ass rather than being as flat as a board. The detail sequins were of gold, and it brought out the gold in Clary's hair. The dress was skin tight, and Izzy needed to help zip her up. When Clary turned, Izzy squealed and clapped. "I knew this one would be perfect for you. As Clary took in her reflection in the mirror, she couldn't deny that Izzy had amazing taste. This dress did look gorgeous, and it suited her body well. It was slightly lower cut that Clary would have liked but if it were up to her, she would have her neckline at her neck not part way down her chest. She was only wearing a simple cotton bra and undies, and unfortunately, with this dress, it did not work. You could clearly see both. Izzy pulled out the bright pink bag that was sitting on the floor. "Don't worry I planned for this. Izzy rummaged through the bag and pulled out a very lacy set. Clary eyed it suspiciously but decided it wasn't worth the argument. She went behind the screen and changed again. The undies left no awkward line, and her bra was hidden perfectly under the dress but pushed her up and out. She felt like she was going to spill out. She returned to face the mirror again and saw that it wasn't as bad as she thought. They were only emphasised a small amount, but it made a huge difference in the dress.

Izzy took all of thirty seconds to change into her dress. When they came out from behind the screen Clary's mouth fell open. "Holy shit Iz, you look incredible. You'll definitely be fighting boys away tonight. Izzy was wearing a completely sequined dress in a soft rose gold colour. It was very low cut, and the top part was attached to a metal chain that wrapped around Izzy's neck. The dress was completely backless. The dress was a little longer than Clary's and fit every curve Izzy had. The top hung loosely in the middle making it drop just a little further than it was cut. Izzy looked at herself in the mirror pleased with herself. "I did, well didn't I?" She didn't need a reply. By now Clary's hair had started to dry, and all she wanted to do was stick it straight into a bun. Izzy and Clary continued getting ready for another hour and a half. Izzy did both her and Clary's makeup and hair. Both girls looked at themselves on last time in the mirror. Izzy had worked some magic on Clary's hair, and it was up in a loose ponytail with the curls behaving around her face and down her shoulders. Izzy had finally learnt that make-up and Clary didn't mix well so most of that time was spent on Clary's hair and Izzy's make up.

Since Clary had come to the institute, she had taught Izzy many things about the mundane world, but the one thing she regretted most was cameras. Izzy had a collection. Each one had a different purpose, but her favourite was a Polaroid camera that she insisted on using every time they did anything. Izzy's room was decorated with photos from different, events, parties, days out for lunch, even missions. They posed and took a quick photo before walking towards the living room where they both knew the boys would be waiting. It was only five minutes past 7, a record for them. As the girls walked into the room, both boys stopped their conversation immediately. Clary could feel her cheeks starting to get hot and red. She took three deeps breaths to calm herself. Jace only saw her as a friend if that. Her feelings needed to be pushed aside, she'd rather have him as a distant friend than nothing at all.  
"Isabel, you are not leaving the house like that." Alec was standing and walking towards them. Izzy smiled and laughed softly.  
"I doubt you could stop me, anyways we are already late, and I bet Magnus is already waiting for us." Izzy knew Alec well enough that even just the mention of her brother's boyfriend would get him to calm down. Jace didn't say anything and barely looked at Clary. As the four of them walked towards Taki's Izzy and Alec were deep in a heated discussion about her clothing choice and her influence over Clary. Jace and Clary walked side by side in silence. Jace couldn't bring himself to look at her. He knew if he did he wouldn't be able to look away. He saw her coming into the room, and his jaw had almost fallen on the floor. Thankfully the scene Alec was about to cause distracted Clary, and Jace was able to compose himself. It was starting to become cooler at night now, and Clary was thankful she had sleeves, even if they weren't real sleeves she had something.

The four of them entered Taki's, and as Izzy predicted, Magnus was already there at their usual table. They approached, and Alec took the seat next to his boyfriend, and they exchanged a quick peck hello. Jace slid in next to them, and the two girls sat opposite the boys. Jace didn't trust himself sitting next to Clary but sitting opposite her was almost worst. "Girls you are looking exquisite tonight. Izzy, your sense of style, is impeccable." Magnus winked towards Clary and Izzy, and Magnus started talking fashion. They didn't need to order they were regulars and their usual food and drink were brought to them not long after sitting down. Alec talked with Clary about training and different missions. Alec had agreed to let Clary start going on missions, but they had to be low risk, and it had to be with him. Jace sat there silently looking everywhere but at Clary.

"Ok time to move on. It's still early, so there's a nice bar near here that we're going to before we go to Pandemonium." Clary rolled her eyes; she knew they'd be going there. "It is after all where we met you for the first time." Izzy smiled, and they left. With the addition of Magnus to the group, it meant that Clary and Izzy walked with arms linked together. Jace trailed behind them. He wasn't bothered at walking alone. He was however left alone with his thoughts, and at the moment the only thing he could think of was Clary. She looked incredible in the dress. Every inch of her body was accentuated by the dress and the gold brought out the soft gold tones in her hair. Izzy was right, and they reached the bar in no time. The found a table not too far from the bar but not right next to the live music that was going on. Izzy brought a round of drinks, and Jace downed his. He hoped he could drink enough he would stop thinking of Clary and hopefully find someone to take his mind off her. Alec laughed as Jace downed his drink "Clary how hard did you two train today?" Jace heard clary nervously laugh back.  
"If anything, I'm the one that needs a drink, I think I hit the mat a hundred times today. I was close once to getting Jace but failed miserably and didn't get close the rest of the day." Everyone at the table laughed.  
"I think it was at least two years of training with Jace before I beat him," Izzy said proudly.

The group sat and drank, laughed and reminisced about meeting Clary. Well everyone but Jace. Izzy and Clary went up to the bar to get another round of drinks. So far, they had only paid for half the drinks they had had. Jace saw Izzy flirting with a guy as Clary ordered drinks. "Trust Izzy to get distracted by a guy," Alec said. He went to get up, but Magnus held his arm.  
"Let her have some fun, it's not like she can't take him if she needed to." even Jace laughed at that one. "Oh, so he can hear us," Magnus said pointedly.  
"Yea what's up with you tonight?" Alec turned to face his parabatai, "You've been acting weird all night. Spill." Alec held Jace's stare.  
"It's nothing; I'm fine." Jace looked back down at his drink.  
"Bullshit. Jace, I've known you since we were kids and I'm your parabatai, I know when somethings up so either tell me to know, or I'll bring it up for the rest of the night." Alec knew Jace would rather die than have this being brought up all night; Alec could get extremely annoying.  
"Ok fine, it's Clary. I don't know. I thought I needed space so I pushed her away and then when I realised I was an idiot I went to tell her, and I heard her on the phone say she loved Simon and that she only saw me as a brother and friend and it couldn't ever be more than that. Then today something changed, and I couldn't handle being just her friend and training I kept knocking her down because I didn't know what else to do and then tonight seeing her like this just made me realise that I never stopped loving her and having feelings for her. You happy now? That's why I can barely look at her, and I'm not in the mood. Is that what you wanted to hear." Alec looked blankly at Jace for a moment. His mouth was gaped open. He turned and faced Magnus who had a smile spread across his lips. "Oh, great now you're going to make fun of me, just great." Jace went to stand up went Alec finally pulled himself together.  
"Jace no wait. It's definitely not what you think happened. Please sit." Jace sighed and sat down not looking at either boy. Alec made a short whistle sound, and Izzy came straight over to the table. Clary was still busy talking to the bartender.  
"Hey, you remember a few weeks ago Clary called you while you were out on patrol. She was almost crying." Alec looked at his sister knowing she remembered exactly what he was talking about. She sat down in a chair.  
"Yea of course why?" Izzy seemed confused. There was an important piece missing before she was going to understand what was happening.  
"Jace here overheard part of the conversation where Clary declared her love for Simon and only saw Jace as a friend." A moment of realisation crossed Izzy's face before she burst into laughter.  
"Oh, god seriously. That's what you heard." Jace was going bright red. He didn't want to talk about this, and now he had Izzy laughing in his face about it. Jace knew he shouldn't have this with Alec. "Oh, honey you misheard everything. Clary called me because she realised she only saw Simon as a friend, a brother even. She was worried that if she broke up with him, they wouldn't be friends anymore but she couldn't stay with him because she loved somebody else." Izzy looked pointedly at Jace. He stared blankly back still not quite understanding.  
"Ok great but that still doesn't explain why you were laughing at me," Jace started playing with the paper coaster on the table, pulling it to small shreds.  
"Really for someone as cocky as you how are you not understanding." Jace still didn't look up. Izzy flicked him on the forehead. "It's you, you idiot. She realised she was still in love with you. She went to your room that night after breaking up with Simon to tell you but apparently, you just wanted to be friends." At that, Jace looked up shocked. He must have heard wrong. Did Izzy just say Clary was in love with him? "by the angel, you really are stupid. She's in love with you, and she's been heartbroken since you told her to be just friends." Jace didn't know how to digest this information. It couldn't be true. They must just be playing a joke. The other three all rolled their eyes and smoothly changed the conversation as Clary came back to the table. She had come with shots for everyone as well as another drink. "After this, I think we should move on; It's already past 10." The five of them clinked glasses and downed their shot together. Only Clary made a face after swallowing hers, Izzy laughed and made a joke that she needed more practice. It wasn't long before the group had finished their drinks and were making their way towards Pandemonium.

Everyone was definitely tipsy at this point, and Clary used Izzy as an anchor to walk in her heels. Every time she almost tripped her and Izzy broke into laughter. Alec and Magnus walked arm in arm laughing at the girls. Jace walked behind them and started to think about everything he had been told this evening really. Concentrating was a lot easier when sober, but Jace knew one thing. He wasn't going to let Clary spend another day thinking that Jace only wanted her as a friend. Izzy managed to flirt their way into the club. If it weren't for her, they would have to wait in the insanely long line. Even being shadowhunters didn't guarantee entry to the club especially when it was clear they weren't on patrol. Magnus dragged Alec straight out to the dance floor. The music was loud enough for the bass to vibrate through their bodies. Izzy and Clary made their way up to the bar, again scoring a free drink each. They both giggled, downed their drink and made their way to the dance floor. Jace had never seen Clary like this before. She had never let loose around him. Even Izzy had said that she barely drinks when they go out. He liked how carefree she was right now. The two girls dance together. As they moved closer to the middle, it was like people were clearing a path around them for them to get to where they wanted. The music had a strong bass and was very quick. The girls jumped and shimmied in time to the music. Jace sat at the bar drinking his second glass of water. If no one else was going to be alert he needed to start sobering up. He knew water would only help the hangover tomorrow, but if he stopped drinking now, he would sober up soon.

All Clary could feel was the music through her. She danced with Izzy and then by herself when someone had started dancing with Izzy. It wasn't long before someone had put their hand on her hip and started dancing with her. She didn't care. She was finally letting loose. Jace had finally proved tonight that they wouldn't work if they got together. He had been moody and distant all night, and it drove Clary crazy, so she wanted to let loose. Before she knew it, Izzy had grabbed Clary again, and they started dancing with each other. The person behind Clary had clearly got the message and left. Clary could feel herself becoming lighter and freer. Those last few drinks were hitting her now and hitting hard. She had never had that much and definitely not in that small amount of time. Izzy could see that Clary would take a turn soon even if Clary couldn't. She drew out her stele and drew on a nourishment rune. Izzy had worked out a while ago that this rune while meant to help when starving also helped lessen the power of alcohol on someone has had too much. Clary barely felt the burning on her skin, and she suddenly felt less dizzy and in somewhat more control. She was still far from sober, but she was at least aware of her surroundings now.

Jace finished his second glass of water and decided that he was ridiculous, he drew a bravery rune on his arm. He knew he'd spend the entire night sitting at the bar if he didn't. He wasn't a coward it was more about him being stubborn. He felt the rune take effect and he made his way to the girls on the dance floor. He had a much trickier job of navigating the crowds than the girls did. He was being bumped into and pushed by people dancing around him. He knew exactly what he wanted to do.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

 **Hey guys, sorry this has taken me so long. I've tried a couple of times to reupload this chapter and every time the text is still odd. Hopefull, this finally works.**

Izzy watched as Jace struggled through the crowd. She knew this was him making his move. He didn't do it often, and if he was doing it now she was concerned it was to do with the alcohol and things might be different if they hadn't been drinking. She also knew she couldn't stand in his way. He would never forgive her and Clary was a big enough girl to make her own decisions. Jace continued to struggle through the crowd. He seemed to be getting nowhere. Izzy laughed to herself and left Clary to help him. As she did someone moved towards Clary. She took no notice. She was moving to the music by herself without a care in the world. He didn't want to come on too strong, so he just danced close to her at first. When Clary moved her arms, he traced her fingers with his lightly. Clary's eyes focused on him then, finally taking notice of the man in front of her. He was tall, almost as tall as Jace. He had jet black hair and bright green eyes. They looked almost like her own. She was intrigued and started dancing closer to him. He placed on hand lightly on her hip, moving with her to the music. Clary couldn't take her eyes off him, he was beautiful, in an almost familiar way. She couldn't put her finger on it; she blamed the alcohol and the ecstasy of dancing on her inability to concentrate.

Just as Izzy reached Jace she saw his expression change; she turned to see what changed, Clary dancing with some stranger. Even Izzy could see from a distance that Clary was staring at him deeply. Izzy was not going to let this guy ruin everything. She grabbed hold of Jace's wrist tightly. Not allowing him to pull himself free. She was not going to let him walk away now. The two of them watched Clary and this dark haired stranger dance, so close but there was space between them. They moved in a similar way which should have complemented each other, but it made the movements look planned and calculated not free and easy. He spun Clary so that her back was pressed up against him. He had one hand still on her hip, the other traced lines from her fingers up her arms and around her neck and backed down her arm again. He made eye contact with Izzy who was staring daggers at him knowing he'd eventually make eye contact with her. She watched as he bent his head towards Clary's ear. He whispered something that made Clary giggle, and then he spun her before walking away.

Clary continued to spin and dance to the music. Jace could see how free she was. He hadn't seen her like this in a long time. The last time was probably the first time he had ever seen her dancing at this exact club so many months ago. It seemed more like years. Izzy continued to pull Jace through the crowd. People seemed to part for Jace. He saw the way guys looked at her when she passed them. How they always took a double take. He could tell Izzy could see them even if she wasn't looking. She had always received this kind of attention and had loved it. Finally, Jace was close enough to Clary that Izzy let go of his wrist. She gave him an encouraging but menacing look. In other words, go now before I beat the shit out of you. Jace nodded and made the rest of the way to Clary. He took a completely different approach than the stranger. He walked up behind Clary and rested his hand on her waist, swaying to the music with her. He felt her lean her head back against him and take a deep breath in.

Clary knew instantly that it was Jace behind her. No one smelled the way he did. She stiffened and tried to move away. She did not need him ruining her night any more than he already had. His mood hadn't improved the entire night; she wondered why he even came out that night. Clary brushed him off and kept dancing. She couldn't help the way she felt about him deep down, and now she was going to make herself seem irresistible to him even though she knew he'd never feel the same way again. Clary saw Izzy and decided to dance with her. She didn't hold back. She wanted Jace to watch her have more fun without him, but part of her wanted her to watch as she swayed to the music. Izzy entertained her for a moment but soon another guy came up behind her, and she left clary again. Jace wasn't even a full second behind and grabbed Clary's hand and spun her towards him. The mix of everything she had drunk tonight didn't help her balance, and she half fell against his chest and into his arms. A shit eating grin spread quickly across his face. _Isn't this what you want_ Clary thought. Why was she pushing him away when he finally did exactly what she wanted?

He moved to the beat of the music with Clary. She looked up at him. He could tell she was going to say something or try to move away. He didn't have long, so he placed both hands on her waist and bowed his head down to her ear. "I was wrong ever to think we could be just friends." He was trying not to yell in her ear but the noise level in the club he was afraid she wouldn't hear him if he spoke too quietly. "Have I told you yet how amazing you look tonight." He could feel the blush rise on her cheeks. His cheek was pressed against hers, and he could feel the heat rising. Clary didn't say a word she just kept dancing. She didn't try to move away either which Jace saw as a good sign. They kept moving to the music. As the songs continued they got closer and closer together. Soon it felt like every part of them was touching the other. Clary could feel his breath on her neck. He spun her around she pressed her back into his chest. She didn't want to be further away from him than she had to. The past few moments of dancing together had reignited every feeling she had for him. She couldn't believe he was dancing with her. He rested his head against hers. His lips inches from her ear, now and then they brushed against her ear, and she could feel goose bumps rise on her arms. He bent further, and his lips lightly touched her neck. This drove clary crazy, and she spun in his arms back around to face him. She looked up at him, looked deeply into his eyes.

"I've wanted to do this for weeks, and I don't think I can hold back anymore." He raised one hand to lift Clary's chin. Jace lightly kissed Clary's lips. It was the faintest of touches, but the spark returned. Jace felt it stronger than last time. Clary still hadn't moved and Jace being completely fearless didn't hold back this time. He titled his head lower and pressed his lips against Clary's with more force. He knew there was a chance Clary could still reject him, but it didn't hold him back. As Jace started to pull away, he felt Clary raise onto her toes to kiss him back. Her arms were around his neck; she pulled him closer, she interlaced her fingers in his hair as she deepened their kiss. Jace was completely shocked. While he hoped for this reaction, he didn't expect it at all. His shock faded and he pulled Clary closer to himself deepening the kiss even further. He couldn't get enough of her. She was completely intoxicating. His hand that was on her cheek trailed down her body and wound itself around her waist. Her fingers played with the ends of his hair. Jace felt goose bumps rise on the back of his neck. He wanted Clary to be closer. He couldn't get enough. His hands were splayed across her back. Moving from her hips to her back to try and get her closer. She did the same, pulling at his neck to reach him better. Even in the heels, she was wearing she still wasn't quite tall enough and was raised completely on her toes. Clary's head was swirling. She couldn't think. All she knew was Jace was kissing her, and she was kissing him. After a moment, Clary could hear herself telling herself to slow down. They were in the middle of a public space. She needed to cool down.

She did the last thing she wanted to do and the last thing Jace expected at this point, she pulled away. Just enough that their noses were still touching. "I just need a minute. I'm going to grab a glass of water I'll be back." As she lowered herself she looked at Jace; he hadn't taken his eyes off her. "Don't move ok?" She was afraid that when she'd return he would no longer be there. Clary headed for the ladies' room. She just needed a moment to compose herself. The room was light quite brightly, and Clary blinked several times waiting for her eyes to adjust. She ran her hands under the cold water. _What was I thinking, what was he thinking? Why now?_ Hundreds of questions swirled in Clary's mind. She took three deep breaths to calm herself down. She needed to figure out how she felt first and then figure out how Jace felt.

Clary could feel a burning on her arm. She pulled up to see a wobbly looking rune on her arm. It faded into a small silver line. She remembered Izzy grabbing her earlier, but she didn't really pay attention. Now that the rune had worn off Clary could feel herself caring less, and starting to feel less worried about everything. Clearly, the rune only delayed the effects of all the alcohol Clary had had that night, it did, however, give her body time to process as much as it could before it wore off which meant her liver wouldn't be so overworked and some of the alcohol would be out of her system by now. She still couldn't think clearly. Jace had kissed her. After what had seemed like forever of him ignoring her, **he** had approached her; **he** had pulled her close. This was everything she had wanted from him.

Since the moment, they found out they were brother and sister her heart had broken. She felt empty; she couldn't believe that something so terrible had happened to her. She didn't want to reflect on that now. She cupped her hands under the tap and took three handfuls of water. She braced herself against the bench and looked at herself. She did feel better, but she knew tomorrow would feel like death. Pulling out her own stele she drew another nourishing rune on her arm. Her hand never wobbled or strayed from the designed lines. Clary could draw no matter what state she was in and the stele was not like a pencil or paintbrush it was an extension of herself, and it barely needed guiding once she pictured her desired rune.

The effects were instant just like the time before. She hoped this would help clear her head. After one more handful of water, she gave herself a once over in the mirror and left. She was on her way back to where she left Jace only to see some tall blond hair girl dancing all over Jace. She was tall and all leg. Clary could see her clearly from where she was. She was wearing a black dress that was basically split in to, and the top was attached to the bottom by a silver hoop at both the front and back. It was so low cut there was no way she could be wearing a bar with that dress. The top stopped around her ribs, and the bottom didn't start again till her hips. Clary though that this girl could not be showing more skin if she tried. Even Izzy would think this dress was too much. Completely frozen in her spot Clary didn't know what to do. Should she go up there and push her out of the way, claim what she thought was hers. Clary thought better of it and made her way to the bar. The bartender saw her approach and made his way over to where she was. "Can I get you anything?" he asked looking her up and down. Clary felt disgusted having someone look at her like a piece of meat, but it was better than no attention she thought. Which is completely the opposite of what Clary would think if she was sober. She would rather have no attention that the attention of this sleaze-ball. Clary smiled sweetly at him just as Izzy had taught her. She placed her arms on the counter and leaned over just enough to accentuate her chest.

"Feeling a little sweet. Wanna surprise me?" she was flirting with him in the hopes of getting a free drink. She did not have her wallet on her. Alec had offered to take their ID and bank card. Izzy didn't plan on using hers most of the night, and she made sure Clary wouldn't either. As Izzy says "The angels did not bless us with these looks for us not to use them to our advantage." Neither Jace nor Alec agreed, but she claimed that if in 90% of their missions they wanted to use her as bait for the male and occasionally female demons she could use her looks for free drinks.

He smiled back at her and gave her a wink before turning around and pouring several different liquids into the metal cup and shaking it. He was clearly trying to impress Clary. She looked at trying to look interested. This was part of it she vaguely remembered Izzy saying. He grabbed a large cocktail glass he rimmed it with syrup and sugar before scoping some ice into it, he added the purple mixture into the glass before topping it with fairy floss. It was made to look extravagant, but it didn't even take him a minute to make it. As he set it down in front of her, she looked at him seemingly impressed.

"Oh, wow when I said impress me I wasn't expecting this. Thanks." She smiled at him before "reaching for her wallet.

"It's in the house, don't worry about it." snap! Just like that, he was caught in the exact trap she had set for him.

"You're too kind are you sure." Izzy taught her to play sweet and innocent. It suited her more than up front. He winked at her and walked over to serve someone knew. Clary took a sip and was actually impressed. It tasted amazing and exactly what she felt like. She moved away from the bar afraid that the bartender would try and start a conversation with her. She moved over to some of the tables that were placed on the fringe of the dance floor. She had lost where Jace was. She scanned the crowd, but she couldn't see his golden blond hair. It normally glowed in darkness like and was easy to spot especially with the lights flashing.

Jace had waited for Clary to come back. He made sure to keep an eye on the door. He thought about walking closer, but he didn't want to crowd her. He stayed put just as she asked and hoped she would come back soon. Several girls had tried dancing with Jace, but he made it clear he was not going to dance with them. He felt rude, but he barely noticed them. One girl didn't get the message. She moved around him. She was persistent and would not take no for an answer. Jace finally broke free of her and noticed Clary walk towards the bar. He decided he was not going to stay put. He started towards the bar.


End file.
